Oh Man, Aaron Pierce (who is not a stupid white man) sent me this damn site again and now I can’t get anything done. Some good ones:
klint is president and chief executive officer of the swedish american health system
mike garvey is placed on administrative leave amid allegations that he’s had sex with male prostitutes
adam greenfield is an excellent actor
matt wade is expressly forbidden
dr. menlo is a stapler that emits a constant high
That last one turns out to be the result of this site, which also tells me that:
klintron is a saucepan that can heat a small house
matt wade is a briefcase that’s great for hammering in nails! It shreds documents and looks like a pot-plant.
william blaze is a cardboard box that keeps drinks cold and looks like a fish
pagan moss is an explosive device that feeds your pets and can play the trumpet
brennio is a security camera that runs on compressed air and is laced with vodka
sauceruney is a pair of underpants that doesn’t distract you from your work, is monogrammed (up to three letters) and must be replaced every morning.
water is a pot plant that makes you invisible, plays the theme from Steptoe and Son and lasts for up to a week